Searching [Chapter 4]

[esp_dragon]

Fandom: Original
Summary: The world of Torpin is open, dragging in xeni from other worlds. The majority of them are monsters, prone to violence. There are some, however, that are not, and are able to live amongst the human population, if allowed to. Marland should know; he's one of them. His job is to hunt and stop the xeni that seek only to destroy what's around them. On one job, a human xeno drops through a portal, an event which Marland has never heard of happening before. And that's not the only thing different about the human...
Rating: R
Notes: Contains swearing.
Genre: Urban fantasy
Word count: 7,002
Total word count: 27,111
Status: Work in Progress (reposting, but is complete)



It was still raining when Marland woke up. It wasn't heavy, but it was there, enough to make its presence known. His ears twitching, Marland listened for anything out of place. Nothing much, but he could hear humans talking quietly, and the thrum of the TV. He didn't recognise the voices, but he could guess that they weren't actually in the room.

Marland stretched out his left arm, feeling the tug of muscles. He didn't try it with his right arm. He did feel better though, mostly rested, apart from the pain in his shoulder. He couldn't tell what the time was, not with the sky being as overcast as it should be. Should he roll over and just sleep some more, or - yeah, get something to eat instead. He wasn't sure how long it had been since he'd last eaten, but it had definitely been a while. Marland slipped off the bed and into the main room.

Shodin was sitting on the couch, watching TV. He noticed him instantly, looking up at him and waving.

"Evening."

He grunted in return, one ear twitching halfway down before it went up again.

On the TV, two people were trying to sell -Marland squinted at what they were holding- anti-wrinkle cream. The background was a block of swiftly changing colours that kept dragging his eye away from what was in their hands and it very quickly just hurt to look at.

"Paizinel went home," Shodin told him, indicating the empty space where she'd been sitting with a jerk of his head.

Marland flicked his ear to the side again. That was obvious; she didn't usually stay for very long, the enclosed spaces being too small for her comfort.

The next ad that followed the first had the same talking monkeys as the ones he'd seen…yesterday? This morning?

Marland went over to the kitchen and started to fix something up to eat.

"Is there a reason why there are so many 'ads'?"

That had been about two minutes before the first question. "They want your – our… They want money." While the food was heating, Marland got a few more painkillers.

Shodin was watching him over the back of the couch as he opened the cupboard. "What's that?" Shodin asked, open curiosity written clearly on his face as he stared at Marland's hand.

"My painkillers," he said as he ate one, trying to swallow it as fast as he could. Ugh. The taste never got any better.

A frown slowly grew on Shodin's face, his eyebrows lowering. "Your...medicine?" he repeated uncertainly.

Marland nodded, not sure why he was dragging the conversation out. Maybe if he didn't, Shodin would ask about something else that was harder to answer.

There was a few more seconds of silence as Shodin watched him eat another piece.

"You said that medicine was white, and very small." There wasn't anything accusatory in his tone, but there was a hint of a question behind the statement.

The microwave dinged. Marland shrugged with his wings, the limbs lifting up higher and spreading out slightly, before folding back in again. "That's human medicine," he reminded him. He walked over to the microwave and got out the meal, and then a drink from the fridge.

"So that's your medicine?"

"It's a painkiller for me," he clarified properly at last. "To the humans here, it's chocolate."

Shodin tilted his head, looking back at the cupboard. "And that is…?"

"A sweet." Marland eyed him, waiting to see what Shodin would ask next, but he had an inkling that he knew at least one thing that would be asked. But Marland had hadn't been right the last couple of times he'd thought he knew how Shodin was going to react so he was going to be wrong.

Shodin's eyes kept flicking to where he kept the chocolate and then back to Marland. Huh. Was he right this time…?

Sighing, Marland went to the cupboard, and took out the packet he'd just been handling (there wasn't a lot of chocolate left in it, but there was enough that it wouldn't just be a taste and then be gone). It was only after he started walking back with it that he realised that, while Shodin seemed perfectly fine with talking and being with him, that didn't automatically mean he was fine with eating something he'd touched.

Shodin's eyes were lit up as he smiled, his lips parted and a bit of his teeth showing through the gap. The look then dimmed and Shodin drew back slightly, eyes lowered.

Hmm. Right twice in a row. Marland didn't feel so pleased about it this time.

He spun back around to get an unopened packet, his wings and ears quivering. He should have known. Really, just having Shodin not screaming and trying to kill him should be enough for him. Why was he suddenly expecting more? Why was he so…hurt about it? He'd been so. Fucking. Stupid.

"Marland…?"

Snatching up a new packet, Marland glanced at it to double-check that it was definitely unopened and then stalked back, trapping the growl at the back of his throat, but he couldn't stop his ears being plastered to his skull, or the small baring of his teeth when he dropped the chocolate in Shodin's hands. Shodin fumbled with it, not expecting that.

That done, he turned away, but not before he saw the startled look in Shodin's eyes change and harden.

Hah. He really should have –

Shodin lunged over the couch, far quicker than Marland thought he could be, and caught his wrist.

He snarled at him, his lips pulled back, displaying his fangs fully, and yanked his arm away, his wings flaring.

Shodin also had a surprisingly strong grip. Marland was only just able to free himself, maybe only because his scales were harder to hold on to. Fuck. Shodin made another grab for him and he backed away, snarling and beating his wings at the human. Fucking hell.

Of course. Of course he should have expected this. The human was just a good actor. A really good actor - but he still should have seen this. Should have known that this would happen eventually. Why had he even thought that there was a chance of this being different?

"Marland!" His voice was sharp, his eyes angry as he stood on the couch, his hands braced on the back of it.

What? What was he going to say -

"Dammit, what's wrong?"

His inner diatribe stuttered. ...It was just another act. Just more lies to hide the truth.

Shodin sighed, bowing his head and running his hand through his hair. "Marland, what's wrong?" he asked again, his voice more subdued as he looked back to him.

There wasn't any point in answering him. Marland tried to look away, but he couldn't. He didn't know what Shodin would do next, so he had to keep an eye on him; he ended up turning his head away, but not actually moving his eyes. The only other sound in the flat apart from the rain beating on the windows and the tinny talking from the TV was the constant steady growl from his throat.

Shodin's shoulders slumped slowly, his expression changing. His eyebrows bunched together, but he didn't look how he normally did when he was concentrating – his eyebrows tilted up slightly as they drew up together, but Marland hadn't seen that expression before, so he had no idea what it meant.

Shodin looked away again, going down to sit on the couch armrest. "What did I do?" His voice was quiet, almost a whisper.

Why was he asking? He knew - he knew...didn't he? Shodin knew he didn't like non-human xeni, so why was he hiding it again now? Marland ignored the clenching around his heart, the growl rising in volume a notch.

There was a muted sigh. "I...would thank you for the chocolate, but I'm not sure I want to try it anymore." Shodin played with the packet, his fingers running along the serrated edge. He huffed softly, his lips twitching. "I wasn't even sure if I wanted to have some in the first place, seeing as it is your medicine - it's more important to you."

Marland stared at him. What? Slowly, Marland brought his wings back, stepping away from the counter to make sure they would have enough space, his ears also moving back up. His growl also petered off. Shodin just hadn't wanted to eat it because he'd need it later? ...That could be another lie. But. But Shodin had hardly been reacting like most of the humans here, and Marland already knew that his assumptions, when it came to Shodin, were wrong.

Shodin noticed him relaxing, his fingers slowing down. He didn't look at Marland directly, his eyes darting back to the chocolate.

Marland was glad about that. Then he wouldn't feel so stupid. Or stupider. He...should stop 'knowing' how Shodin would react to things. Shodin had grown up on another world, where there weren't xeni, and maybe there wasn't something with sharp teeth and claws that hunted humans on his world. He hadn't been brought up with xeni being a constant danger, and even if he had, there was still the memory loss.

Fuck.

"I...I thought you didn't want to eat something I'd touched," he mumbled, his ears lowering again. Interacting with people was too difficult.

Shodin's jaw dropped, his eyebrows rising, and he craned his neck to him. "Why would you think that?" Shodin's mouth worked again, but no sound came out. There were probably too many questions trying to be asked at the same time.

Marland's ears went completely flat, and his wings drew up to cover his head before he could stop them. Because he just knew that would happen if he'd offered food he'd touched to a human here, if they hadn't run away by that point or attacked him. Xeni were dirty. It was a trick and the food was poisoned. Or something.

"Ah." Shodin sighed, his eyes softening. "Never mind." He shook his head. "No, it wasn't because of that; I didn't want to try the chocolate if you needed it later."

That, Marland had already figured that out. Maybe he should just start clarifying everything with Shodin before he said or did something. There was a large chance that Shodin would think differently on some level. Marland still ducked his head, still wanted to hide under his wings.

"It's fine." He waved back towards the cupboard. "I've got a lot more - they last for a long time and I've stocked them up for just in case." Probably enough to make an adult sick and if he ever needed that much all at once, he was probably going to be dead soon afterwards anyway. He’d make himself sick by the time he'd went through half of it – the taste was horrible.

Shodin glanced back at the chocolate, the look he had been wearing when this all started back on his face. "Are you sure? I don't want to take this away from you."

He rolled his eyes. "I have enough. You might not like it anyway."

Shodin continued to stare at it, frowning. "If I don't like it, then it would be a waste to open another pack."

He was being surprisingly...something anyway. Marland didn’t know what the word was. He shrugged with one shoulder, his wings settling back in place. "I'll put it back - or put it in the fridge."

"Or you could just give me the open pack," Shodin said, his tone dry, his head hilted and his eyes warm.

Marland’s ears only flicked down for a second before he could get them back up again. Or he could do that.

Marland went over to the cupboard, got the open packet and walked over to Shodin, strangely hesitant. Or he was just feeling awkward.

Shodin reached over the back of the couch for it, smiling with his eyes again. With his head cocked to the side, Shodin slowly unwrapped the chocolate. Seeing the pieces, his head moved a little more to the side. Shodin took the chocolate in his hands like he'd seen Marland do and snapped a row off. He then snapped off an individual piece. Twisting his hand around it, he looked at it from all angles before putting it in his mouth.

His eyes widened and he looked startled. Marland's ears went down slowly, wary. Maybe Shodin was affected by it.

"Ahm," Shodin said, trying to talk past the chocolate. There was a crunching sound as he bit through it and then swallowed. Shodin blinked, his tongue moving inside mouth. "It was definitely different from what I expected."

He looked down at the rest of the chocolate.

"You can have the rest of it."

Shodin frowned. "But..."

Marland looked away, shrugging slightly. "I was going to give all of it to you anyway."

"Are you sure?" Shodin pressed.

"Yeah."

Shodin smiled at him, wide and happy.

Marland watched him eat another piece, not understanding how it could taste nice to him. But, it was made for human tastes. Maybe human medicine tasted the same to them as chocolate tasted to him. He turned away and picked up the plate and cup he'd left on the table. The food wasn't as hot as before, but it was still edible. It should be anyway. He left the kitchen area and sat on a chair, watching Shodin's fascination with the chocolate.

Shodin finished it fairly quickly, staring amusedly at his sticky fingertips when he was done.

His wrists didn't look as raw anymore, the marks not as prominent, not as red. There was still a lot of bruising though, spreading up his arm. Shodin slid off the couch armrest and walked over to the kitchen, washing his hands. He came back quickly, a drink in one hand. Well, they had that in common, when it came to chocolate.

They were quiet for a while and Marland ignored the movie as he ate, the machine gun fire making his ears twitch every time one was fired. Which was often.

"Marland...?"

He twisted an ear towards Shodin.

"Are the humans here really strong?"

What? Marland looked up from his food to stare at Shodin.

Shodin waved towards the TV. "They're able to keep going even after being what I thought was mortally wounded."

Marland glanced at the TV. The character on the screen was male, shirtless, heavily muscled, had blood running down every limb, as well as lots of blood splattered across his chest and, as far as Marland could tell, was supposed to be shot in the thigh. He was also clearing metre-long jumps, a massive gun the length of his back strapped to his back.

"No," he snorted. "It's a film - it's fake."

"But, some of it is real," Shodin pressed, blinking as a car screeched into view.

"Some of it, yeah." The car tried to run up to where the man was. The man yelled, unloading probably enough bullets to balance Marland in weight into the car. Which then promptly exploded. "It depends on what you watch." With a fresh sheen of sweat shining on him, the man continued on whatever he was doing. "They...exaggerate things to make them more interesting."

"Really?" Shodin peered at the TV. "I don't find it all that more interesting."

Marland shrugged. It was better than the romance ones; those, he would never understand.

Shodin started watching the TV again, but then glanced back at him, frowning. Marland's wings began to arch over his head, but he forced them down, waiting.

"Your bandages have started to unravel."

He looked down and saw the tape holding the bandage together desperately clinging on, but it wouldn’t be long before it would fall free. It was probably time to change it anyway. He had no idea when they'd been put on, and Shodin's had been on for longer. As he watched, the last bit of tape gave up and let go of the bandage, where it swung down and hung there limply.

When he looked up, Shodin had already stood up and was coming back with the first aid kit. He hadn't heard – no, he had heard Shodin move, his ears swivelling to follow him, but he hadn't taken that as something to take notice of properly.

"Do you want to finish eating first?" Shodin asked as he opened the kit and started to take out the stuff he'd need.

He had already finished, and was just poking at the remnants. Marland shook his head and put the plate on the table.

It only took a couple of tugs and the bandage was loose enough to pull free completely, only sticking at the shoulder. The wound had clotted, though pulling the bandage off had made it start bleeding again in places. The swelling around them had gone down a little bit, and so had some of the bruising, his skin a pale green colour, rather than the mottled dark purple spots that had been there a day ago. The bandage was dark red in some areas, a yellow ring around the edges where the blood had been absorbed.

"Do you think we should clean it?" Shodin asked, frowning at it, as his hands played with a clean bandage.

Marland nodded without any hesitation. He didn't know what the liquid had been exactly, so he had no idea how it transferred, and if was still in the wound or not. He glanced at the bandage in his hand. They'd need to wash their hands afterwards, and burn his bandage.

Shodin hummed as he walked away, a small tune that looped after only a few notes. While Shodin was busy, Marland called his fire to him, igniting the piece of fabric.

The humming paused, becoming uncertain. Shodin didn't stop filling the basin, and he looked over his shoulder at Marland. Shodin's eyes widened briefly when he saw the flame in Marland's hand, his breath catching in his throat, but that seemed to be the only reaction he had. Which, considering how he'd reacted to everything else about Marland, was different.

So, he didn't react to what a person looked like, but magic was something that affected him more? Weird.

"Is that...magic?" Shodin asked hesitantly as he came over again with the filled basin, his eyes focused on the burning fire. The room smelled of ash, the air full of light pieces of what was left, but Marland didn't mind it. Shodin coughed a little as he got closer, the water sloshing in his hands.

"Yeah." When there was nothing left, Marland stopped calling his magic to him and the flame flickered from view.

"How do you control it?"

There was no way he was going to be able to answer that and make sense; it wasn't as if he'd really thought about it. Marland shrugged a wing. "I was born with it, so...I just can." He did it out of instinct – it was so natural to him that he probably would have had the same difficulty if he’d tried to describe how he breathed.

"Hmm." After he had set the basin on the closest chair to Marland, Shodin wetted the cloth and, after he’d made eye contact to make sure Marland knew he was going to start, began to gently clean the wound again. It didn't hurt as much as last time, and Marland barely twitched when the cloth made contact. His skin was still sensitive, but the drag of the cloth didn't feel as rough, and the water felt cool, rather than icy.

"It's looking better," Shodin commented.

The ear closest to Shodin flicked towards him. It didn't take as long, and when Shodin was finished, the water wasn’t as dark a brown as it had been the first time.

"Okay, I'm going to get the antiseptic cream now."

Tongue curled in his mouth, Marland began growling softly, his ears flat. He pulled his right wing back further and tensed it, so it would take longer to react, and he'd also have something else to distract himself with. He kept twisting his head away and then twisting it back again to watch where Shodin went, because he didn't want to know when it was coming, but he also wanted to know when it was coming so that he'd know when not to react.

He ended up watching Shodin edge directly towards him slowly, rather than coming in from the corner of his eyes. His wings flared halfway out on the first contact of the antiseptic, but for the most part, the pain stayed steady, and it didn't grow much further than the first spike. It didn't wane either, but it was better of the two options.

"And I think that's it done," Shodin said a few minutes later, stepping away. "Now to wrap it up." He reached over for the bandages and tape. Shodin put the end of the bandage in the same place where he'd started before, and Marland trapped it there before he asked.

He could see the curve of Shodin's smile from his vantage point and his ears flicked to the side before going back up again. He knew the routine of putting a bandage on, and he hated hearing something repeated at him when he knew what to do.

He was still uncomfortable with Shodin going around his back, but he didn't try as hard to keep him in view, his ears tracking him almost enough to make his back not feel completely vulnerable.

It was eventually finished, and it felt like it had taken a lot less time.

"All right," Shodin said, turning back to the basin. "Now that's done…"

Marland cocked his head, a little puzzled. "What about your bandage?" If his bandage had needed changing, then Shodin’s would need to be changed as well.

Shodin's hands stilled for a second above the basin before moving again. "My wound isn't as serious as yours, so the bandage doesn't really need to be changed."

And that was a lie. Leaving it on could be one of the worst things you could do. Marland knew that. His ears sank down and he looked away. So Shodin didn’t really trust him in the end.

Shodin glanced back at him, over his shoulder. "You're…not going to let me go until you've changed the bandage, are you?"

He shook his head. "No." Not that he was even holding him, so he didn't understand what Shodin meant by that.

Sighing, Shodin's shoulders slumped. "I see." He looked at the couch and then the chair that the basin was on top of. "Would it be easier for you if I sat on the couch, or the chair?"

Marland looked between the two. "The chair." That way, he would have more space to manoeuvre.

Shodin moved the basin out the way while Marland stood up, testing the bandaging. It was maybe a little tight, but he would still be able to move easily. When Shodin sat down, it was with his knees together, his hands resting on his thighs. Except they weren't really resting, tapping out another, quicker beat.

He approached slowly, watching Shodin closely. Shodin wasn't looking at him, but that was almost...expected now, when he was supposed to go near him.

Marland pulled gently at the tape and it came off easily, with hardly any resistance. The bandage unravelled easily after that, but he could see that Shodin was tense as he pulled. He didn't know what he could say that could help -if it would- so he continued tugging, stubbornly making sure his ears stayed upright and didn't move.

When it got to the part where the bandage had direct contact with the wound, Marland slowed down, his ears primed and paying close attention to Shodin. It was clear where the bandage had covered the wound, a clear dark line across his throat, like another collar.

He pulled at it, as slowly as he could, feeling every bit of skin ripping free as he did so. Shodin tensed more while he was doing it, fingers no longer moving, clamped onto his knees. Marland could see every twitch of his neck, could hear ever little gasp that Shodin made, but he kept going. It would have been stupid to stop when they were more than halfway done, and there would be consequences for Shodin if they didn't finish this.

Eventually the last part came free and, out of not being bothered to throw it in the bin, Marland burned Shodin's bandage too. That action caught Shodin's attention, his eyes sliding towards the light and Marland could see him relax slightly.

Shodin's neck had started bleeding blood and puss again after pulling some of the scabs off, but for the most part, it looked worse because of the dry blood that was stuck to his skin and the purple bruises, not because of the actual wounds. Peering and craning his neck forward, Marland couldn't see where the pinpricks were easily, the raw skin being much more obvious. He turned his head and then stared at the basin, flicking his ears at it.

He sighed. They should have changed the water first. He glanced back, wondering if he should be making comments like Shodin had been, and Shodin gave him a smile and nodded. The smile was more just a stretching of the lips though, and not one of Shodin's usual ones. So Shodin knew he was going to change the water – but Shodin still said what he was doing, even if it was obvious. Ears flattening, Marland picked up the basin and walked over to the kitchen. How had Shodin done that so easily, without being awkward?

When he got back, Shodin's body posture hadn't changed much; he was still staring at the wall, ignoring the film making more explosions, but his fingers weren't digging so much into his thigh anymore. Putting the basin down quietly, Marland made every effort to keep his ears up.

He slowly brought up the cloth, wanting to warn Shodin first, but he felt stupid just when he opened his mouth, so he kept it shut, focusing on not ripping off more skin and keeping his ears up, the tips quivering with his effort.

Shodin tensed again at the first touch, his nostrils flaring and his hands tightened on his thighs. After a second, Shodin took in a deep breath, breathed out, and with gritted teeth, relaxed. Marland waited to see if there was anything else, but when there wasn't (wasn't anything, no more relaxing, no more talk). Shodin continued to flinch at some touches, but Marland could at least tell that it wasn't because of him exactly, but from the pain of the wounds.

There wasn't that much new blood, merely trickles - the rest of it was from the days before. Underneath, the skin was really pale compared to Shodin's tanned skin in some places and Marland wondered if that was supposed to happen. His ears flicked forward as he looked at it closely. Well, he knew that it wasn't supposed to happen normally, but he didn't know what happened to human skin once it'd been damaged, since it was either by bandages or clothes, or he didn't see the person again until they'd recovered from it.

Shodin had taken to breathing in deeply while Marland cleaned his neck and breathing out when Marland cleaned the cloth. He glanced down at the t-shirt that was rapidly becoming damp; they should probably take it off the next time they changed Shodin's bandages.

There wasn't that much blood in the basin at the end. Shodin's neck looked much cleaner, but there was a clear band of skin that had been stripped away and Marland wondered if that would scar. The t-shirt had been drenched though, most of it at the top, though some parts had wet trails leading to the bottom. Marland stared at it, considering, before he looked away. No point in changing it right now.

Now he had to apply the cream.

Shodin flinched at the first touch, jerking away.

"Ah, sorry."

"'S fine," Marland muttered as Shodin moved back. He was tenser, almost shaking, and Marland paused, unsure. Should he...?

"I'm all right." Which was another lie. Shodin couldn't really think he'd believe that, especially with that strained tone of voice. He had to work his mouth open after clenching it for so long. "Just carry on."

Still uncertain, Marland continued to watch Shodin, who didn't look back at him, his face turned away.

Taking a deep breath, Shodin said, "I would rather get this finished as soon as possible."

Marland's ears flicked down at the clipped tone but then shook his head, bringing them back up again relatively easily. He hadn't exactly been happy about the situation before either, nearly giving Shodin a new lot of bruises with his wings alone. Taking a deep breath himself, Marland started applying the cream again.

He kept an eye and his ears on Shodin, in case he jumped more than usual, but it didn't seem like it, though his hands were probably as tight as they could be.

It took a long time before he finished, pausing at every stage, but he wasn't sure if that actually made things better for Shodin, or if it made it worse because he was dragged it out.

Shodin took a shaky breath when Marland stepped away for the fourth and final time, his fingers uncurling and curling again a few times. After he had picked up the rest of the bandages and tape, Marland's ears twitched when he realised that he would need to buy some more soon, nearly all of it used already. Next time, he should buy a lot more.

Shodin's other hand had already come up to hold the bandage in place when Marland turned around. After Marland had taped it down, his hand went back down to rest on his thigh again. As Marland moved around him, he realised that Shodin was actually tenser than he'd been when Marland had been applying the cream. Was he putting it on too tight? He started loosening it but stopped when Shodin spoke.

"No, it's all right." Which was an obvious lie, the same one as last. "Keep going."

His ears slowly going down and then back up again, Marland continued.

He had to adjust the bandage a few times, when it didn't cover what he wanted, and it was during those times that Shodin was the worst. He didn't want to rush, but he didn't want to be doing it any longer than he had to either.

Finally, finally, finally they were done. And he didn't want to do that ever again.

Except he knew that he would be again, very soon. His clamped ears tried to move down even more. Marland turned away, picked up the basin and went back to the kitchen. Getting rid of the water and attempting to clean the cloth helped to distract him, and his ears eventually came back up again.

Shaking his hands to get rid of the excess water, Marland heard Shodin speak behind him.

"Sorry I wasn't much of a conversationalist there."

He snorted, feeling a little mollified. "'S fine. Didn't talk much when you were doing it either." Shodin had still talked more than he had when he'd been getting bandaged up.

When he turned around, Shodin was still sitting on the chair, his hand was wrapped around the top of his left arm again. Probably a comfort gesture. Shodin was putting the tape and bandages back with his free hand.

Booming music proclaimed the end of the film, the ending credits beginning to scroll down. The rain had mostly faded, sounding more like a drizzle, and the light hadn't changed much, so they were fully into night then.

Shodin had begun to tap another slow beat on the first aid kit, only with his index finger this time, his head bowed and staring at the lid. Slowly, he stood up and set the first aid box on the table, shaking his hair out of his face.

"I was feeling Puzz while you were doing that," he admited quietly. The hand on his shoulder tapped quickly and restlessly.

Huh. Well, Marland had thought Puzz reacted to Shodin being in pain or scared. But then, Shodin should have been more affected by the cream, not the bandaging.

Shodin sort of flopped onto the couch, his arms and legs spread. "I think..." He shook his head gently. "No, I know Puzz can hear me and understand me - it's just, it's so fragmented. I could only hear pieces; he jumped around topics quickly, and he never fully addressed me." He frowned, sighing, and then looked up at Marland. "I was hearing his thoughts."

Marland didn't envy him; he’d already had enough of Puzz with the little exposure he'd had of him. Having direct contact and not being able to get away from that... Ugh. Marland walked over and sat down on one of the chairs.

Shodin had watched him as he did so, but when Marland looked back at him, he avoided his gaze.

He really hated interacting with people. It wasn't like he knew what to say to get people to talk, far more comfortable to just sit in silence. He could recognise when someone was uncomfortable, but he didn't know what he could do about it, other than just walking away, because it was usually because of him the other person felt that.

One of Marland's ears flicked to the side as he realised the track that his thoughts had gone. Shodin was feeling uncomfortable? He glanced back at him. Shodin wasn't keeping eye contact with him well, just a small look, like to confirm that Marland was looking at him before his eyes darted away again. His face was blank, his gaze slightly downcast. His body wasn't as tense as it had been, but it was still stiff, even though the posture seemed relaxed. His breathing wasn't that even either, shorter than normal. Marland blinked at him. Puzz must have really bothered him.

The second time Shodin looked back at him, they held each other's gazes, waiting to see what the other would do. His ears pricked forward, his head slightly cocked, Marland kept staring, expecting after every second that Shodin would look away again.

Shodin was the one who broke away first, but he was chuckling softly at the same time, a small smile on his face. It…wasn't really a happy one. "I'm worried about Puzz," Shodin started slowly, as he reclined on the couch, his knuckles brushing against his wrist. "And about myself."

Really? But he hadn't seemed worried about not being able to go back home. Which wasn't the really same.

"I don't know how or why I have these," –Shodin indicated the marks on his wrists and the bandage around his neck with a wave of his hand- "and, I want to know." Shodin's hand stopped moving and he sighed, looking away. "Was I being punished for something? If I was, what did I do?" Shodin paused, eyes distant. "Or was it something different?"

How the fuck was he supposed to know?

"That is why I wonder if Puzz is also involved," Shodin continued after a breath. Shodin's hands had encircled his wrist, his fingers curled over the mark.

One of Marland's ears flicked at that. Puzz had done something and Shodin got blamed for it? Or Shodin had done something because of Puzz. Or… There were too many possibilities, and Marland was thinking from the perspective from what he knew about Torpin.

Marland shrugged with his wings. He could easily see Puzz attacking someone but…only to defend Shodin. That could be misinterpreted though.

Shodin's hand moved back to his shoulder. "He hates that I've been hurt but, there's a bit of guilt there as well."

Huh. "So…he knows how you got hurt?"

Shodin nodded slowly. "I think he might."

Marland thought over what Puzz had said before. But Puzz had memory problems as well. They didn't know how Shodin had lost his memory, so Puzz might have been affected, but not in the same way as Shodin; he went crazy instead, focusing solely on protecting Shodin.

There was a small smile on Shodin’s face. "But I couldn't ask him directly; I was too busy trying to keep him calm." That must have been hard, especially since Marland had kept continually 'hurting' Shodin, which would have set Puzz off again.

"Why aren't you asking now?" It wasn't like Shodin to not ask questions at the first opportunity.

Shodin's mouth moved, not in a smile, but it was tilted to the side. "I can't hear him anymore, so I'm not sure if he can hear me either."

That wasn't completely true, or else how would Puzz know when Shodin needed to be protected? Ugh, like he knew how this whole thing worked.

Shodin shook his head, sighing. "There's nothing I can do about it, I suppose."

Marland stared, vaguely surprised that Shodin would let it drop so easily. But then, the only person who could answer his questions, he couldn't talk with right now, and even if he could, Shodin probably wouldn't get an answer that made sense, if he even got an answer. It was kind of nice to know that Shodin could hold back on his curiosity though. If he’d stop asking him questions as well, that would be even better.

Marland mentally reviewed what was left of the bandages and tape as he picked up the first aid kit: not much, and pretty much finished respectively. In the fridge, it was nearing empty as well, barring the drinks – he was far too used to buying for only one person and hadn’t bought that much more at the shop than he usually did.

He sighed, his ears moving half-way down before he forced them up again. More shopping. Hmm. He still had the money Laris had paid him so he'd be all right for a while, and he still had a stash exactly for when he got injured. He looked at Shodin, considering. Shodin didn't say anything, waiting, though Marland could see one corner of his mouth twitching slightly.

"I'm going shopping," he announced, then waited to see what Shodin would do or say.

"Ah, all right." Marland was starting to recognise the intense curious look on Shodin's face: his eyes opened a little bit more, his smile widened, his lips parting slightly so that some of his teeth showed, and he tilted his head to the side a little bit.

He sighed again, his ears flicking down and his wings drooping. He couldn't be bothered dealing with what he knew was going to happen. "Yes, you can come," he said with a small roll of his head. He was going to badger him to come along anyway.

Shodin blinked, his mouth falling open and his eyebrows rose. Marland stared at him, slightly confused. Then Shodin’s mouth curved back into a smile. "Actually...I wasn't."

Marland considered him suspiciously, his ears pricked towards him. What? He wasn't what?

"But thank you for letting me come out with you."

Marland's ears flattened. And he'd assumed what Shodin would do again. He really had to stop doing that. "...Just stay in my sight, okay?" He wasn't sure if the warning would do anything; he had a feeling that Shodin would wander off anyway. Or maybe he wouldn't, considering he'd defied all of his other expectations.

"But..." Shodin started, and then hesitated, looking away. "Are you sure that I should go out with you?"

What did that mean? Marland didn't say anything though, and waited to see what else Shodin would say. He'd jumped to enough conclusions for tonight.

"I thought you didn't trust me," Shodin continued, "and you definitely don’t trust Puzz."

...He had said that. Marland stared at Shodin, his ears flicking as he wondered what had changed. He didn't trust Shodin, no, not completely, but he didn't expect him to break into his room and try to kill him either. And Puzz, he didn't think he'd decide to go off and kill people, not without Shodin being threatened first.

"I don’t," Marland said slowly. "But I know you won't try to kill me the first chance you get." That was his biggest concern, and Shodin had had more than enough opportunities to do that and never did it. "Puzz..." He shrugged with his wings. "He's loud - I'd be able to find him if he took off." In some ways, he didn't consider Puzz to be a danger either, so long as it didn't involve Shodin; Marland was more concerned about him walking off in another direction while Marland wasn’t looking.

...Since when had he been so flippant about something like this?

The hesitation in Shodin's eyes faded, and he smiled, it mostly being in the eyes this time. "If you are very sure."

Was he? Maybe he was. Shodin...was going to end up out of the flat at one point anyway, so it would be better if they got most of the questions out of the way as soon as possible.

"Yeah."

Shodin then glanced down at his feet, wiggling his toes. Right. Shodin needed shoes. The pair he'd been wearing when he first fell from the portal were still around, weren't they?

"I'll be back in a minute," Shodin said as he stood up and went to his room. Marland half-followed him and went into his own room to pick up the money.

Shodin came out at the same time Marland did and they spent the next couple of minutes getting the flat ready for their departure.

After a quick check to make sure he had everything he needed and then they headed out the door.


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